Stuck in the Middle

I will share with you a conversation I had with my 3 year old last week as we sat on the couch:

J: “What’s this?” (He pushes his finger into my abdomen and watches the first half [of his finger] disappear as if sinking into a wad of pizza dough.)

Me: “What’s what?”

J: “This.” Now grabbing my stomach with his thumb and forefinger.

Me: “It’s my stomach.” I tell him matter of factly.

J: “Oh, I thought it was your boobies.”

Me: “Nope, stomach.”

That’s great stuff.

Then, Thursday evening I had a function to attend with my husband. I had a dress in my closet that I wore once a year ago and thought would be perfect for the occasion. With no time to waste a half hour before I needed to leave, I don the dress with curlers in my hair. Wouldn’t you know, I can’t zip it. I can’t believe I can’t zip it. I try and try now working up a sweat with hot rollers on my head, working myself into a tizzy. This was honestly the only dress in my closest I could have worn to this function and I had to wear it. Thank god for my babysitter. Between the two of us, we were able to suck me in and pry that zipper up so I could run out the door. I can’t recall in recent history needing another person to help me into my clothes.

First thoughts? I must have gained weight. Ya think???? And wouldn’t you know my boobs showed up after I thought I would never see them again after breast feeding. The evolution of boobs when you breast feed is quite amazing and took 3 ½ years to come to fruition. I honestly thought I was going to be stuck with the deflated balloons I had for a year after I stopped breast feeding but a couple weeks back, my size C’s showed up.

One more thought, I have officially hit an age where I can’t wing it to run out the door and expect to look good. When I was in my 20’s I could wait till almost go time to throw on a dress and some mascara and be good to go. Now? I officially need more time to de-wrinkle (clothes and face), pre-moisturize, conceal, color, powder, post moisturize, volumize, glamorize and squeeze my pizza abs into some lycra death-grip girdle thing so I can zip my damn dress.

When the conversation with J and the dress incident happened in the matter of one week, I thought my BatchaGirl image of myself would be lost forever. Definition of Batchagirl: timelessly sexy. But the key is to still love myself with all of the physical changes the (late) 30’s bring. So it takes a little longer to look good. That is really ok.  I am tickled with my life in its current state at my current age and I hope to keep that positive attitude always. And I have to say the 30’s are a much sexier decade than the 20’s. I know myself so much better. I ask for what I want more (sometimes) because what I want is important. I never did that in my 20’s. I realize that joy and pleasure are of utmost importance in my life and I remind myself to write them into my to-do list. I purposely laugh and smile more and that is timelessly sexy.

So, I am back to the gym to firm up my abs and enjoy fitting into last years jeans. There is no reason to accept a mushy middle as my fate so young in life. I hate every crunch and yoga bicycle with every ounce of my being. They say the thing you avoid doing is the thing you need the most. I understand that, don’t like it but understand. I am trying to embrace the changes I see in my body and my face. But that doesn’t mean that Botox and Juvederm aren’t starting to show up on my Christmas Wish lists. Hey, whatever works!

I have a lot more sexy living to do in my 40’s, 50’s and beyond. I see so many of my gorgeous friends doing it so well. I know (with a little work on my part) it will only get better from here!

3 Responses to Stuck in the Middle
  1. Susi
    October 19, 2010 | 5:53 am

    Oh my gosh Stacey, get out of my head! You always seem to write what I’m thinking/feeling. I cleaned out my closet this weekend, and had to come to grips with the fact that there were some really cute cloths I have been hanging on to, that I just wasn’t going to be able to fit into again. The good news is, a friend of mine at work has an adorable 16 year old daughter that fits into my hand me downs perfectly. The huge smile and hug I received when handing over 3 shopping bags full of cloths this morning made it all worth it. And now, I have room for a few more flattering and perhaps sexy pieces. Thanks for reminding me sexy is still an option…;-)

    November 7, 2010 | 12:33 pm

    Honey, wait till you get into your forties!!!! if you thought thirties were good, your going to love the next phase. A sense of the REAL you will shine thru with no hesitation, as long as you keep your sense of humor (you will need it with the wonderful aging process, and yes, botox and juviderm will become your best friend HAH) but, when you realize that life is just one big learning process, and with an open mind, its such an incredible journey. I’m acutally looking forward to the fifties now, who would have guessed!!!!

  3. Donna
    November 9, 2010 | 5:33 am

    I refuse to give in to the late 30’s body dragging face sagging saga! I threw out all of my clothes in my closet right before leaving on a six month excursion; not because they didn’t fit me but because I do not intend to fit into them when I return. I will be almost 38 by the time I return and intend to pull a dress off the rack without trying it on…once again!

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